“Sire!” calls Bedivere, as the magic barge’s gangplank retracts all by itself and Arthur, up on deck, lies down with his head in Morgan’s lap. “Sire! What will happen to me? I’m the last Knight of the Round Table!” “You’re … Continue reading →
“Well, darn,” says Sir Lucan. “C’mon, let’s get the king’s body out of here,” says Sir Bedivere. “Those looters are going to be coming through here soon.” Lucan and Bedivere pick up Arthur, and did I mention before that Lucan … Continue reading →
Morgan lets Tristram leave. Afterwards, her paramour, Sir Hemison, mounts up in full arms and armor. “Where are you going, all dressed up?” she asks him. “Going to catch up to Tristram and joust him. I didn’t like the way … Continue reading →
“So tell you what, you tell me your name and I’ll let you go, Queen’s honor.” Morgan extends her hand, and she and Tristram shake on it. “All right then, I may as well tell you I’m Sir Tristram of … Continue reading →
Sir Dinadan’s strange adventure turns out to be pretty brief, and also to require a trigger warning perhaps, inasmuch as he meets a damosel who mak[es] great dole. Long story short, she tells Dinadan how Pitiless Bruce murdered her brother … Continue reading →
This short chapter is divided into two hilarious stories, neither of which reflect well on Sir Gawaine. I almost feel bad for him! Malory does not especially care for Gawaine, you ever get that feeling? First off, Gawaine gets … Continue reading →
This chapter may have been written while Malory was in the throes of a stroke, or possibly two pages were stuck together and his editor missed it, or something, because not only does it make no sense in the familiar … Continue reading →
Sir Lamorak rides off in a huff with Sir Dirant. They haven’t gone far before they stumble upon an unnamed knight in service of Morgan le Fay, the Queen of Gore. Lamorak wastes no time in beating this knight up … Continue reading →
Hours later a maiden comes in with Launcelot’s dinner. Let’s call her Becca. Have I used Becca? I don’t think I have. Becca comes in with a plate of cold stew for Launcelot, and a pitcher of ale, and she … Continue reading →
You’re probably expecting Launcelot to wake up, discover Lionel is missing, track him down, slay Turquine, and free everybody, right? I know I would be expecting that. This story takes a weird turn, though. Let’s turn our attention back to … Continue reading →
